There aren't a lot of people on this earth that I'd stand in line for a half-hour to buy a cup of coffee for ... well, outside of my family anyway. That's definitely something my dear old mom passed on to me ... I am not a good waiting in line kind of gal at all. But this morning, not only did I stand in line for 30 full minutes to buy an iced mocha for someone, I did it willingly and with the utmost patience. Why would I wait so long for a coffee, you ask? Because I was taking that iced mocha to my friend who recently returned home after having open heart surgery at Mayo Clinic. Seeing my dear friend Debbie this morning was worth every single minute that I spent waiting in line plus a million more.
As is always the case with true friends, the time flew by as we sat in the living room of the apartment she and her husband moved into a little over a week ago after their house sold while they were still in Minnesota following her surgery. It's more than a wee bit ironic that we both felt the need to downsize at the same time, and it's a whole bunch ironic that both of our houses sold within days of each other. We talked about how scary it is to move from a house to an apartment, about all of the big life changes we're experiencing and about how much emotion is wrapped up in leaving the homes we've lived in for so many years. We talked about washers and dryers and square footage and recovering couch cushions and fixing the cane bottoms of old chairs and floor rugs and dogs being confused by their new places to live and closets and storage space and selling our furniture.
Our conversation this morning, however, included a topic that was far more important and meaningful to both of us than all the ups and downs of downsizing and moving. We talked a lot about friendship ... about the friendship we've shared for more than 20 years. We don't always agree on everything, but we do agree on the most important thing ... we will always be there for each other no matter what. We agreed that we'll never understand how people who've been a huge part of your life can suddenly, without warning, just disappear. Trust me, I know the pain of that kind of loss and it isn't fun. I've experienced that hurt more than once in my life and it isn't fun, friends ... it isn't fun at all.
Even though I know I shouldn't, I wonder sometimes if those friends who decided to pull the plug on the friendship we shared ... or the friendship I thought we shared anyway ... I wonder sometimes if they ever think about me. I wonder if they ever wonder how I am or how my kids and grandkids are. I wonder sometimes if they've ever regretting bailing out on our friendship or if they ever wish they would have done things differently. I wonder sometimes if they ever miss talking to me or laughing with me or going shopping with me ... yeah, yeah, I know ... no one in their right mind would ever miss going shopping with me. And the worst part of wondering all those things is that I even wonder those things at all ... no, wait ... the worst part of wondering all those things is that I still care about people who obviously never wonder those same things about me.
I got teary this morning as I told my friend how much she means to me ... how very, very, very much her loyalty and unconditional love have meant to me all these years and how very, very, very much they continue to mean to me today. I know I'll never have to wonder anytime about what I mean to her or if she cares about me because I know she'll never walk away ... no matter what, she will never walk away. And you know what? She knows I won't either.
I know if my sweet friend were sitting here with me tonight, she would tell me to tell you that life is short ... she would tell me to tell you that true friends are hard to find ... she would tell me to tell you that friendship is a precious, precious gift to be appreciated and treasured ... she would tell me to tell you not to ever let it go. I hope I'm half the friend to her that she is to me. I know her ... she'd stand in line for a whole day to get me a soy decaf latte with sugar-free vanilla ... you bet your iced mocha she would ... she surely would.
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