This One's For You, Elizabeth

Today is one of those days that means something to me ... a day that means a whole heck of a lot to me. Funny thing is that until a couple of years ago, I didn't even know today existed. The truth is I never really gave much thought to suicide prevention, and I certainly had no idea that in 2003 today, September 10th, was designated as World Suicide Prevention Day. I didn't know that each year, every 40 seconds someone commits suicide ... that's a little more than 1 million people every year. I didn't know that more people die from suicide than by homicide and war combined. I didn't know that studies have shown attempted suicide numbers to be 15 to 20 percent higher than the number of completed suicides. I didn't know that suicide rates among LGBT youth are six times higher than that of the general population. I'm ashamed to say I didn't know any of those things until I was there myself ... until I was the one with the pills in my hand ... until I was the one who wanted to die.

I've been thinking about this evening's post for a while, and I had a bunch of eloquent and heartfelt things I planned to write. But then I got an email ... an email from a young girl named Elizabeth. Some of you will remember her ... I know I will never forget her. Elizabeth was one of the first people to write me after we launched our Ears Wide Open? video, and the words of her note haunted me for months. 

"I'm 13 years old and all I want to do is die because I'm not normal like my friends. My uncle sent me this video. I have a gun and bullets and all I want to do is die. Do you think maybe it will get better for me too."

I would wake up at night wondering what her name was ... wondering if she was still alive ... wondering why she had chosen to write to me. But then several months later, I got an email from her mom telling me her daughter's name was Elizabeth ... telling me about the progress Elizabeth was making ... telling me that Elizabeth was not just alive but that she was thriving. Her mom attached a photo of Elizabeth to that initial email, and I wept when I saw it ... that original heart-wrenching note from a 13-year-old girl suddenly had a name and a face. As I close this evening, it seems more than fitting to share part of the note I received from Elizabeth today. 

"Hello Terrie its Elizabeth. I know mom wrote to you last week but she said I could write today because it’s the special no more suicide day for everyone. I am doing good and liking school and have two real friends now. After I wrote you that first time about having a gun after I saw your note cards video my mom and dad got me changed to a different school. I still get teased some about being fat but its not as bad at the new school and now I have two friends."

Love each other, friends ... love each other and take care of each other and cherish every moment you have with each other. And Elizabeth ... you go, girl ... you rock my socks off ... you go, girl ... you go!