When you're single with no hope of ever being un-single, Valentine's Day always brings with it the potential of being a really cruddy day ... I know that to be true because I've been single for a long, long time, and I've seen a lot of really, really, really cruddy Valentine's Days over the years. In fact, now that I think about it, there's only been one Valentine's Day in the last 20 years that I was actually dating someone when the "romantic" holiday rolled around. I suppose I should take the glass half-full approach and count all the money I've saved in those 20 years by not having to buy gifts for a significant other ... hmmm ... sorry ... I guess you can just consider my glass half drunk because I'd rather be dead broke than to be alone on Valentine's Day year after year. My kiddos have always been great about making sure they sent some extra love and attention my way on that day, but as much as I love them and appreciate all they do to express their love for me, it's not the same as ... well ... you know ... it's not the same as having that one special person to do life with. I believe that God created within each of us a need and longing for an intimate personal relationship ... sorry if I offend some of you, but I don't believe God meant for me or you or anyone else to go through life alone. Which brings me back to the reason I'm writing this post ... the reason for every post really ... the reason for everything in life really ... the reason for life itself really ... and that's love.
My children have given me some incredible gifts over the years ... Christmas gifts, birthday gifts, Mother's Day gifts, even Valentine's Day gifts. Each and every one have been special to me, but even more special and unforgettable are the sweet memories that go with them. It would take me forever to tell you about all of them, but I do want to share just one with you today ... one that's taken on all-new meaning to me over the last two weeks that I've been in Canada with my son Matt, Becca, Coraline and Amelie. Even though this past Christmas was an electronic one for us via Skype, I could see that Matt and Becca seemed extra excited for me to open the gift they had sent me (and Coraline had been telling me for the previous two weeks that it was "someting bery special, Ghee"). I was filled with great anticipation when I opened the gift, and I wasn't disappointed ... inside was an awesome leather bracelet with a silver plate on the top which was engraved with several numbers. At first glance I thought perhaps the numbers were Coraline and Amelie's measurements at birth ... their height, weight and the dates they were born ... but then I realized that was incorrect. Feeling rather dumb because I didn't know what this obviously important gift meant, I had to ask what the numbers stood for ... "That's our location, Mom ... those are our coordinates." Yes, I cried ... of course I flipping cried ... a lot.
Yesterday was a first for me on Valentine's Day ... I was awakened by my oldest granddaughter who excitedly proclaimed, "Wake up, Ghee! It's Happy Valentime's Day a you ... get up and come upstairs ... dere's a special surprise for you!!!" It took everything in me not to cry when Coraline proudly handed me a special piece of artwork she had created for me ... not only is she a genius, she's also a budding Rembrandt in the making. And I seriously thought my heart would melt right onto the floor when she handed me the card she had picked out for me ... I was obviously taking too long to open it because she grabbed it back and ripped it open for me as she shouted, "Wook, Ghee, wook!! It's 101 Dalmatians, Ghee ... wook, Ghee!!! It's da dalmatians, Ghee!!" Her little blue eyes were absolutely dancing with happiness ... not because of what I gave her for Valentine's Day, but because of what she gave me. Little does my precious Coraline know that she gave me so very much more than a beautiful piece of artwork and "da best 101 Dalmatians card ever" ... if I'm still around when she's old enough to understand, maybe I'll tell her ... maybe I'll tell her what she gave me yesterday was love.
When I was getting ready for bed last night, I took off my bracelet and placed it on the corner of the sink so as not to get it wet when I washed my face. Tears filled my eyes as I snapped it back onto my wrist and I recalled the words from when I first opened my gift on Christmas day ... "This is where love lives." I realized as I snuggled into bed next to Matt and Becca's two wiener dogs that love does indeed live at the coordinates engraved upon my bracelet ... there is a deep and abiding love within the hearts of my son and his sweet family ... love does indeed live at the location etched on a silver plate attached to a leather band that encircles my arm. I tossed and turned for quite a while before I finally fell asleep last night, partly because I have to get on a plane for home tomorrow morning. As I thought about my quiet and empty house ... as I thought about how happy Julie and Ollie will be to see me ... as I thought about returning to the regular routine of life ... I saw Coraline and Amelie ... I saw their ready and glowing smiles ... I heard the sound of their laughter ... I felt the warmth of their hugs.
That's what my bracelet is really about, you know ... it's to remind me every day that I have two little girls who think I'm a pretty awesome Ghee. It's to remind me that even on the darkest of days and loneliest of nights, there are two little girls who love me ... two little girls who love me just the way I am with my prickly hair and all the other parts of me that make me their Ghee. My bracelet reminds me where love lives, yes, but it also reminds me that love isn't dependent on longitude or latitude coordinates ... love is dependent only on the coordinates we carry with us in our hearts.
Where love lives ... love lives in me and you, friends ... love lives in me and you.
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