Ernest Hemingway once wrote, "Write hard and clear about what hurts." I know firsthand just how difficult that can be ... to write hard and clear about what hurts ... but I also know firsthand that from the deepest pain often comes the greatest growth. I've written and rewritten this opening paragraph about my guest blogger, and the truth is there are no words that can adequately convey to you the depth of her love for her family, the determination within her convictions or the tremendous scope of her strength and courage. What follows are words from her heart ... I'm sure they will touch your soul as they did mine. Hugs and prayers to you next week, dear friend ... you're an inspiration to all who know you.
"The Whole Person
I'm facing surgery within the week that will be an extremely powerful trigger to a very traumatic event in my life. I am not a veteran and I did experience loss of life in my trauma, but the threat was very real. The kicker for me is that the trauma was at the hands of a trusted doctor. You may be asking what was the trauma; the details really aren't important. It involved the threat of life lost, all my power being taken away, and a great deal of pain that haunts me still.
It's been over 18 years since the trauma and I have to admit I'm more than a little upset that I find myself dealing with triggers daily and now have to battle the worst of all of them. I do my best to minimize the issues. I do my best to forget, but I have become aware that I have more to learn from my experience. I'm not convinced the education is to benefit me, but as He often does with lessons, I'm pretty sure I'll be a resource for someone else in a similar situation and it will make a difference.
The catch phrase I've heard lately is, "We treat the whole person." I'm fairly certain when the medical community uses this phrase, they are speaking of the physical body with a sprinkling of spirituality of you ask for a minister. A surgeon really doesn't know about Post Traumatic Stress Disorder so, if I'm lucky, there is lip service given to meeting my needs.
"I'm very proactive in dealing with my health issues," is my new catch phrase to introduce the fact that treating the whole person in my case means we give more than lip service to my PTSD diagnosis. It's not kosher to request specific care, but by utilizing my catch phrase, I open up a real dialogue on things that can help me survive this surgery as a whole person with my sanity intact.
My therapist and I have gone over a plan in great detail in an attempt to anticipate difficult situations while in the hospital. I'm doing my best to hold things together. When I'm overwhelmed with terror or a flashback, I use the tools I've developed to redirect my thoughts and feelings. It's damn hard work. Work that does not go unnoticed by my loved ones. I'm very thankful for the fantastically supportive family I have. I will get through this."
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