You know what I miss the most from the days when my kids lived with me? The late-night conversations. I'm not sure why, but it was those talks at night that always seemed to be the deepest, the truest, the sweetest ones of all. Over the years, each one of my three kiddos draped themselves across a couch or stretched out in a recliner and talked to me, sometimes for hours on end. And over the years, each one of them would come into my room and wake me up after they got home from a late shift of serving at the various restaurants where they worked ... they would wake me up and sit on the side of my bed and talk. Some of those conversations I remember as if they happened only last week, while the details of others have long since slipped from my memory. I may not recall every single word my children spoke back then, but I will forever remember the time we spent together ... talking, laughing, crying, sharing ... I will never ever forget the time we spent together.
My son Brad is home for a few days, visiting friends and packing up for his move to Maine at the end of the month. Brad's doing something else while he's here, too ... he's spending time with me. Both last night and tonight, we took the dogs for walks on the trail ... walks that made my mind race back to the days when Brad was a little guy pretending to be a fireman ... walks that made me remember how I felt when Matt, Bec and Coraline moved to Canada ... walks that made me proud and excited and happy for Brad and the grand adventure he's embarking upon ... walks that made me struggle to hold back the tears ... walks that made me dread the day he leaves. We talked as we walked ... of course we did ... and I quickly sensed something was different about my son. There's a peace about him ... a certainty about his life that I've never seen in him before ... he's focused and determined and excited about the journey ahead.
I've thought a lot today about some of the things Brad and I talked about last night ... big things, little things and all kinds of things in between. But for all those things we talked about and all those thoughts that have been coursing through my mind today, there's definitely one thought, one realization, one truth that's most assuredly risen above the rest. At the end of the day, what's most important in any relationship is being there for each other ... listening ... talking ... walking ... being there. Whether it's family or friends or co-workers or neighbors or any other type of relationship, what matters is that I'm there. Without question, my biggest regrets in life are all centered around times when I wasn't there for the people I love ... times when I should've listened ... times when I should've cared ... times when I should've remembered ... times when I should've asked ... times when I should've talked ... times when I should've walked ... times when I should've appreciated ... times when I should've loved ... times when I should've been there.
I just got a text message from Brad ... "On the way home" ... I think I'll stay up until he gets here. I'm tired tonight, so there's a good chance I won't remember every word we say but I'll most definitely remember the time we spend together. That's the secret to life, you know ... that's the one big thing every single one of us needs to understand to the very depth of our souls, myself included ... it's about more than the words we speak ... it's about so very much more than the words we speak. It's about the time we're together ... it's about the listening and the caring and the remembering and the asking and the talking and the walking and the appreciating and the loving. It's the time, friends ... it's the time that matters most of all.
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