Square Peg

When my children were small, each one of them loved to play with the shape ball. I'm sure many of you (especially those who are moms) know what I'm talking about. It was this tough plastic ball with all kinds of shaped holes cut into it and corresponding shaped plastic pieces to fit each hole. It had these little handles on each end that you would pull to open the ball to get the shapes out so that you could do it all over again. Of the three of my children, Brad was the master of the shape ball ... interestingly, he was also the kiddo who could work a 1,000-piece jigsaw puzzle by the time he was five years old.

One thing that fascinated me with all three of my kiddos was how many times they would try to force one of the plastic shapes into the wrong opening on the shape ball. No matter how often I would say, "That's the wrong fit," they would push and push with their little hands trying to make the shape go where they wanted it to go. Sometimes, they would get so frustrated and angry that they would throw the ball or just give up and walk away. But sometimes, they would listen to my instruction and place the shape where it belonged.

I've always been a "fitter" ... able to make friends easily, chat with anyone, feel at ease in just about any situation. My children used to give me a hard time about my fitting ability, asking me to please not be so friendly in line at Walmart or assuring me that the server in the restaurant didn't want to hear any of my stories. Over the last few months, however, my fit has changed ... my shape doesn't fit into any of the holes on the shape ball anymore. And the more I try to figure out a way to get back inside the ball with all the other shapes, the more I feel that perhaps I never will fit again.

There's something to be said for not fitting, though, for being on the outside looking in at where you used to reside. It's truly a time of reflection, a time of soul-searching, a time of learning ... a time to think about others who didn't fit ... like the woman at the well, men like Saul and Zaccheus, or the woman caught in adultery. And here's the thing, at least one of the things that God is teaching me while I'm walking in the desert. All of those "non-fitters" were in their own deserts in a way, but they were accepted and loved and saved by Jesus. And it seems to me that He didn't ask them to fit ... He just asked them to follow Him.

Help me to remember, Lord, to always remember ... when I don't fit ... when I don't belong ... help me to always remember ... I fit in Your hand, Lord, and I belong to You.