A Very Special Guest

Tonight's guest post is written by a dear, dear friend ... a friend whom I've written about many times in this blog. In fact, because her words tonight are some of the most touching and poignant words I've ever read, and because those of you who know her already know what an amazing woman she is, I'm going to forego a lengthy introduction of her this evening and suggest that after you read her guest post you click here to read what I wrote about her last fall. And when you finish reading tonight, tell someone you love how very, very, very much you love them ... hug them tightly and tell them what a difference they make in your life.

Thank you, sweet friend, for sharing your heart and your wisdom and your soul with my readers this evening. I'm a better person because you're my friend ... love you dearly.

"It wasn't supposed to be like this. Retirement, that is. When the day came at the end of August, 2013, I was so looking forward to a trip to Bryce Canyon, the birth of our first great-granddaughter and lots of lazy mornings sitting on the deck having early morning coffee and reading the newspaper or a good book. But then, the new year rolled in and with it came lots of life's challenges and tears. 

Most of my family and friends know that in spite of the fact that I'm a tough old bird, I cry at the drop of a hat – a sad movie, a happy movie and every Hallmark commercial on television. But never have I shed as many tears as I have in these early months of 2014. First, there was a cardiac stress test for my husband of 45 years. Blocked stents led to double bypass surgery and four days in the hospital. Those were tears of fear. Tears of fear from not knowing whether or not everything would turn out okay that turned into tears of gratitude when he was pronounced healthy and ready to go back out and continue all the plans we had made for retirement. 

But then came the 2:30 a.m. pounding on the front door and ringing of the doorbell by the police that led to the news that our adult son had lost his life in a fiery crash of his SUV that also took the lives of three other people. The tears of the shock of knowing that when I saw him earlier in the day and told him I loved him as he was leaving was going to be the last time I would ever see him as a whole person. Tears of grief took over for days and weeks as we went through the process of giving him back to God - and still there are tears at unexpected moments when a memory floats across my mind about him as a little child, on the day he was married, the day his beautiful baby girl came into the world, at the heartbreak he felt when he got divorced. Memories keep coming ... and so do the tears.

It has been said that tears can be cleansing. And they can free us to go on living and loving. I hope it's true ... I believe it's true. So for the rest of 2014 when I feel the tears starting, I will give in to them and let them do what they are meant to do ... cleanse my heart to keep going and to keep loving. I have always heard that things happen in threes. And the third for me is coming up in June when I have a knee replacement surgery. First will be tears of pain and then, hopefully, tears of relief and joy when I finally regain the ability to walk pain-free and chase my great-grandbaby who lives with us. She is my joy, and she brings back the beauty of each new day."