The Mess is the Message

There's no denying that my dear old mom had a way with words ... heck, it was sort of like she invented her own language that only the people who knew her well could understand. From "twigging up her hair" to "tighter than Dick's hatband" to "ain't bigger than a bar of soap" to "cuter than a bug's ear," the way Mom put words together was certainly the source of many smiles in our family. One of my all-time favorites, though, was Mom's description of when things were a mess. She'd crinkle up her nose and get a certain look in her eye as she said, "Lord, help! Look at what a gomb this is!" And heaven forbid that you were the one who was the cause of said gomb ... by the way, it's pronounced like "bomb" ... because then you were on the receiving end of "Lord, help! Have mercy on my soul and body! You've done gone and gombed everything up!" Trust me, I always lived in fear and dread of that particular pronouncement from Mom when it was directed to me. I don't remember one single time when her saying those words ended up being a good thing for me ... not one single time do I recall Mom's use of the word gomb having a favorable outcome for me.

Over the past couple of days, I've visited with several people who are dealing with some really tough issues in their lives ... really, really, really tough issues. I'm talking big stuff here, my friends ... physical stuff, mental and emotional stuff, relationship stuff ... you know, the really big stuff in life that can rattle you all the way down to the core of your being. As I listened to them share their stories, one thought kept running through my mind ... geez, what an awful mess. Or as my dear Mom would have said, "What a gomb ... what a great big old gigantic gomb." That thought was quickly followed by another ... how quickly life can change ... in the blink of an eye or the snap of a finger or the draw of a breath, my life, your life, anyone's life can change forever. Life can so quickly go from being neat and tidy to being all messed up before people even know what hit them.

I'm always amazed by how strong people can be when life is at its messiest. Bob Marley once said, "You never know how strong you are until being strong is your only choice." Truer words were never spoken ... none of us know how powerful our inner strength truly is until we face adversity. Some of the strongest people I've ever known are people who are right smack dab in the middle of life stuff that would leave many of us reeling. People who somehow find the strength to see beyond the mess they find themselves in. People who even in the midst of their own darkest night manage to summon forth the courage to become beacons of hope to all the rest of us. I'm blown away by those people ... while I'm busy wallowing in the depths of despair when my life's a mess, those folks are busy searching for the meaning in the mess their life has become.

One of the gals I chatted with yesterday said something so profound ... words so intensely and overwhelmingly profound that they seared my soul ... words so intensely and overwhelmingly profound that they branded my heart ... words so intensely and overwhelmingly profound that they pierced my mind. It's my sweet young friend's words I leave you with tonight ... words that deserve your attention ... words that deserve your pondering ... words that deserve your believing.

"The mess is the message, Terrie. There are things I'm supposed to learn from all this mess and then I'm supposed to help other people. I can't have empathy for other people who are going through this without going through it myself. The mess is the message, Terrie ... the mess is the message."