Share and Share Alike

Sometimes I wonder how many times I said the following words to my children when they were young ... "You have to share." It seems to me that of all the things I tried to teach my kiddos, being willing to share was one of the most difficult traits for them to learn. I think one of the funniest examples of their "what's mine is mine" tendencies concerned food when they were teenagers, and more specifically, Pop-Tarts. I would buy enough each Saturday when I went to the grocery store for each child to have two of the tasty pastries for breakfast each morning. The problem was that someone would invariably decide to eat either 1) an extra Pop-Tart for breakfast, or 2) a Pop-Tart at another time of the day. I'm pretty sure that Brad was usually the culprit given his long-standing penchant for all sugary foods. And it was Matt whom I found carefully writing his name in permanent marker on his box of Pop-Tarts one day when I returned home from work, along with a note that said, "Eat these and die." Yep, my hard-fought attempt to teach my children to share was obviously a roaring success.

I've had sharing on my mind today because of a line in a blog post that I read, a line that has given me pause to consider how much of myself I really share with others. I've come to understand in the penning of this blog how risky it can be to open up your heart for others to see into ... how painful it can be to put yourself out there for all the world to judge. The words from the blog I read say it beautifully ... "It is always a test of courage and self-worth to share yourself with another person." As I've thought about those words and rolled them around in my brain today, I couldn't help but wonder ... if I don't share myself with others and truly let them see inside my heart, are my relationships real and honest? If I hide parts of myself away because I'm afraid of being rejected or condemned or ridiculed, am I fooling myself more than I'm fooling others? If I'm not open and transparent with others, am I really the woman God desires me to be?

As I have written before, I believe that God has called me to be open and honest in this blog ... and at times, that has been quite difficult. There have been posts that have generated comments and messages that have stung and hurt, but there have also been posts that have elicited words of encouragement and love. I realize more each day that sharing is a two-way street, that it involves give and take, courage, trust and risk. I can't begin to thank God enough for the people who read between the lines and truly get what I'm saying, for the people who know me inside and out and love me still, for the people who share themselves with me in return.

One of my favorite movies is Indiana Jones and The Last Crusade ... I know it's cheesy, but it stars Harrison Ford and Sean Connery, two of my favorite actors. My favorite scene in the movie is when Indy stands at the edge of a large chasm and takes a step of faith, and when he does, an invisible bridge appears beneath his feet to support him. I think sharing myself with others is like that bridge ... I have to take a leap of faith and trust that a bridge will appear and my heart won't be crushed on the rocks below.

Share and share alike, friends ... share and share alike.