Holy Rusted Metal, Batman!

One of my favorite television shows when I was a kid was Batman ... for my younger readers, there was a television series long before the movies that most of you are familiar with today. My friends and I not only watched the TV show faithfully, we also pretended that we were the characters from the show and would stage our own Batman productions either in one of our back yards or the basement of my mom and dad's house. There was usually a grand debate over who got to be Batman for the day, but not from me ... I never wanted to be Batman; I always wanted to be Robin, the faithful and loyal, albeit somewhat goofy, sidekick to the main superhero. Robin was my favorite of the two characters who made up The Dynamic Duo for several reasons ... he was a flying trapeze guy before he was Batman's sidekick; he didn't take crime fighting as seriously as Batman; he had a wicked sense of humor; he was content playing second fiddle to Batman; he was forever getting into mischief; he always had at least one time in each episode when he said, "Holy mashed potatoes and gravy, Batman!" or "Holy birds with feathers, Batman!" or "Holy molars and canines, Batman!" or ... well, you get the idea; and his costume was way cooler than Batman's ... come on, you know that last one is true, red and green and yellow as opposed to black and gray ... way, way cooler.

Each week on the television show when it was time to shift from their day-to-day secret identities and become superheroes, Batman would say, "To the Batcave, Robin!" And The Batcave ... man, oh, man, The Batcave was only the most awesome place on the planet ... it housed the Batmobile and the Bat Cycle and the Bat Wing ... holy unbelievable vehicles, Batman! There was a computer (it took up half of the space in The Batcave, by the way ... no such things as iPads back then), and there were lots of nifty gadgets and, of course, extra Batman and Robin suits. I'm sure all of you who've seen the full-length movies in recent years are shaking your heads and thinking, "How lame." But to a kid in the 1960s ... suffice it to say The Batcave from the television series was pretty incredible.

There's a lot of Batman hype right now due to the upcoming release of the newest film, The Dark Knight Rises. And yes, come the end of July, I will go see the new movie in the theater just as I have all of the others. Needless to say, the technology that exists in The Batcave from the films is far more advanced than that from the original television series. But in addition to the differences in the vehicles, computers, gadgets and Batman and Robin suits, there is another huge difference ... one that many people would never pick up on if they hadn't seen the TV show. You see, The Batcave used to only be the place that Batman and Robin passed through on their way to battle crime ... they slid down the pole hidden behind the secret panel in the library of Wayne Manor, miraculously changed into their Batman and Robin suits, quickly checked the massive computer (a primitive Mapquest, I'm sure), jumped into the Batmobile and took off to go get the bad guys. In the movies, however, Batman and Robin spend a good deal of time in The Batcave ... when they are wounded, when they are frightened, when they are doubting their mission, when they need to hide from the harshness and cruelty of the outside world.

I saw a commercial on TV last night right before I went to bed promoting The Dark Knight Rises, and I dreamed about Batman and Robin while I slept. It's been really hot here in Kansas City with temperatures over 100 degrees for the past several days. I've kept all the blinds closed in my house to help keep it cooler, which makes it rather dark inside even in the middle of the day. As I was cooking breakfast this morning, I couldn't help but think about The Batcave ... I've left my house one time since Thursday when I got home from meeting my children for lunch ... one time to go to the doctor on Friday morning to get medication for an ear infection (yes, another ear infection), and I am already wishing that I didn't have to leave tomorrow morning to go to work. Standing at the sink rinsing my dishes after I ate, I said out loud to the walls and my dogs ... I'm in The Batcave ... I'm in The Batcave ... I'm in The Batcave. And the more I said the words, the more a thought crashed through my mind. I always wanted to be Robin ... I never wanted to be Batman. I wanted to be the faithful sidekick ... not the hero. I'm in The Batcave ... deep inside The Batcave.

In the movie Batman Forever, Robin delivers a line in true Robin form when he and Batman find themselves on a patch of metal that is rusty and filled with holes ... yep, you guessed it ... "Holy rusted metal, Batman!" Get it? "Hole-y" rusted metal? I know, I know ... but ... God being God, He has something huge to teach me today through my musings about Batman, Robin and The Batcave. This time, though, I'm going to let you figure it out on your own ... holy rusted metal, friends ... holy rusted metal.