Those Eyes of Hers

Today was one of those days I will tuck securely away in the folder of my heart labeled "Days I Want to Remember Forever." Today was one of those days I will forever cherish ... one of those days that carries with it a meaning so deep and so lasting that it has already seared itself into the folds of my brain, the corners of my soul and the crevices of my heart. Today was one of those days I will think of when the burdens of life are so tough to bear, and it will cause me to smile through my tears. Today was one of those days that taught me what real, pure, innocent love really is and the power it has to make me want to be a better person. Today was one of those days I will treasure until I draw my final breath. Today was one of those days when my world stood still every single time I gazed into the most beautiful eyes I've ever seen.

I've always been an eyes person ... I've never paid much attention to other physical attributes or lack thereof, but I always notice someone's eyes. It doesn't matter if it's the gal in line in front of me at Walmart or someone I meet at church or one of my dearest friends ... I am immediately drawn to the person's eyes. Perhaps it's because our eyes speak volumes about us ... if we are kind or noble or honest or trustworthy or loyal or compassionate ... or if we are dishonest or selfish or rude or hateful or cruel. Sometimes it's hard to see the pain or loneliness that resides deep within the tired eyes of another who is desperately searching for hope and meaning in their life. Sometimes it's exhilarating to gaze deeply into the eyes of someone you care for and see contentment and love after they've overcome seemingly insurmountable odds and found peace. And sometimes ... sometimes it's a feeling like none other on earth when you see only one thing looking back at you from the eyes of another ... real, pure, innocent love. Love that carries with it no conditions, no strings, no labels, no barriers, no judgments ... nothing but real, pure, innocent love.

Today, my son, daughter-in-law and granddaughter came to visit me at work and let me show off my little C.J. to my friends. No one in my office has seen her in person since Matt and Becca moved to Canada only a few months after she was born, so today wasn't only a treat for me but for them as well. My heart pounded with anticipation all morning as I waited for them to arrive, and I announced to my friends who sit near me more than a few times, "There's a baby coming here today!!!" When my friend Hilary called out to let me know they had arrived, I raced around the corner ... and there she was ... smiling as I ran to her and swooped her into my arms and kissed her sweet little face and hugged her tiny little body close to my heart. She was the hit of the joint as I carried her from person to person and introduced her ... she laughed, threw the ball, signed and said, "Thank you," and "Please," chose a stuffed Elsie cow to take back to Canada, gave high-fives and my favorite of all ... said, "All done" time and time again while grinning from ear to ear. I'm pretty sure she enjoyed all of the attention as much as I enjoyed being the proud granny as we walked from desk to desk. After lunch, Matt, Becca and I took her to an aquarium not far from my office where she toddled from tank to tank oohing and ahhing over all the "fishies."

I have blue eyes. My ex-husband has blue eyes. Matt and Meghann have really blue eyes. Brad's eyes are green ... not quite sure how that happened. But C.J.'s eyes ... C.J.'s eyes are the most beautiful blue eyes I've ever seen. They remind me of a crystal blue mountain lake or a cloudless blue sky ... her eyes are simply gorgeous. It was as we were riding in the car on the way back to my office and I was sitting in the back seat with her that I was struck by how my sweet granddaughter looks at me. Several times today, C.J. turned her head and looked directly into my eyes and smiled or giggled, but there were also times when she looked directly into my eyes as if she were studying me or looking straight into my heart. Looking into her enormous blue eyes as Matt drove, I began to feel the pain that will come with having to say goodbye to her next week. I gazed into my granddaughter's blue, blue, blue eyes and wondered if she somehow senses how much I want her to love me, how much I need her to love me, how crushed I would be if she didn't love me.

Today was an eyes day for me ... the eyes of a friend challenging me to complete a seemingly impossible task ... the eyes of my son beaming with love and devotion ... the eyes of two other friends desperately hoping for me to be happy ... the eyes of my granddaughter ... those beautiful blue eyes of my precious little granddaughter ... making me truly understand the power of real, pure, innocent love and the immeasurable gift of being given a second chance.