A Seat at the Table

Almost every Sunday evening around dinnertime, I'm sitting on my couch Skyping with my granddaughters. I'm not quite sure how or why we decided that would be our official Skype time, but we did. That's not to say that we don't Skype at other times now and then, just that it's pretty much a given that we'll be computer chatting on Sunday evenings. I'm sure I don't have to tell you how much I look forward to my Skype time with my littles ... it's hands-down the best hour of my week. It's always extra special for me when we happen to Skype while we're eating dinner, because I have a "seat" at their table. And I love, love, love it when Coraline says, "Ghee, you will sit here because this is your seat for family dinner night." I always get teary when my sweet granddaughter says those words, and my tears have absolutely nothing to do with eating dinner and absolutely everything to do with knowing that I'm welcome at their table.

I mentioned in a post a couple of weeks ago that I had been asked to participate as a panel speaker at a conference for mental health professionals, and that event took place last Friday. I'm still not sure why they asked me to participate ... the other four people on the panel were absolutely incredible. We were asked to speak on the topic of diversity and inclusion in the workplace, and more specifically, about our own personal experiences. My emotions swung between overwhelming sadness to total outrage as I listened to my fellow speakers talk about the mistreatment they've endured while at work. From verbal abuse to physical acts of violence to being fired from their jobs ... still today in 2016, even with laws in place that supposedly protect against discrimination, hate is alive and well in many workplaces and its devastating effects continue to permeate society as a whole.

While there were many things said last Friday that made a deep impact on me, I think perhaps the most powerful were the following words from one of the other women on the panel. We were discussing the differences between tolerance versus inclusion when she said, "It's like being invited to a party but not asked to sit at the table." Her words struck me like a bolt of lightning because they are completely and totally true. Being tolerant of those who differ from you in race or religion or age or sexual orientation or gender is in no way the same as being inclusive. Businesses or churches or schools or other organizations that cover themselves with the blanket of being open and accepting but don't want or allow those whom they've labeled as different to get under the blanket with them are far, far away from truly being inclusive.

See here's the thing ... here's the thing I'd like for you to take with you from tonight's post ... the thing I hope you'll mull over for a long while to come. The words you say don't mean anything if you don't back them up with actions ... inviting someone to your party but then telling them there's no place for them at your table is wrong. It's hurtful. It's disrespectful. It's mean. And ... it means you're living a lie.

There's no halfway when it comes to honoring diversity and being truly inclusive of others ... in your business, in your place of worship, in your school, in your home and most important of all, in your heart. Everyone deserves a seat at the table, my friends ... everyone.