4-Way Stop

When I was a senior in high school, my dad bought me a brand new, light blue 1977 Honda Civic. It was one of those itsy-bitsy Civics that looked kind of like a box on wheels. And I loved, loved, loved that little car and drove it until it had almost 300,000 miles on it. In fact, the only reason I sold it was because I got pregnant with Matt and needed a bigger, more reliable car ... yep, I went from a cute, awesome little Honda Civic to an ugly, brownish-gold Dodge minivan. But you know what? It didn't matter even a little bit to me what I drove after Mattie was born because I was a mom, and all I cared about was that my baby boy was safe as we motored along. 

I've got another confession to make ... don't worry, it's not a life-changing one this time ... I have gotten a few traffic citations in my day, and I got most of those citations when I was in college. In fact, I've only gotten two tickets since my children were born, and both of them, of course, were mistakes on the part of the officers who pulled me over. Of course they were. Most of my college-years tickets involved ... ummm ... traveling a tiny bit faster than the numbers posted on those ridiculous white signs that are on the sides of roads, and one of them may have possibly involved trying to ... ummm ... make a few quick turns through a neighborhood in an attempt to get away from one of those officers who was trying to give me a ticket for driving a mere mile or two above the posted speed limit. But the one citation I remember most was the one I got for going through a 4-way stop without ... ummm ... stopping. In my own defense, it was 4 a.m. and there were no other cars at the intersection. I mean, come on ... what's the point of stopping at a 4-way stop in the wee hours of the morning when there are no other cars? Yeah, I know ... sometimes the way my brain works scares me, too.

Every evening when I'm almost home from work, I drive up to a 4-way stop sign. And many of those evenings ... like tonight, in fact ... I'm the only car at the intersection. And almost every time that happens, I think about that night (or morning, I guess) when I was 22 years old and I got a ticket for blowing through the 4-way stop without stopping. And when my mind drifts back to getting that ticket, I begin thinking about how many other dumb and dangerous things I did behind the wheel of my little blue Honda Civic. I begin thinking a lot about intersections ... intersections that have 4-way stop signs posted at the end of each of the four roads to keep the travelers on those roads from crashing into one another. And then I begin thinking about how those travelers are all coming from different directions, driving different cars and going different places. The one thing they have in common is that they all eventually end up at the intersection and have to stop at the 4-way stop. They have to stop or risk getting a ticket or causing an accident.

I tend to believe that when something like the 4-way stop and the intersection gets stuck in my head the way it has this evening, there must be a reason ... there must be a lesson that God wants to teach me, and I think there might possibly be a really big one in this one. The truth is that in life, we are all coming from different directions ... we are all driving different vehicles ... we are all going to different places. There will always be intersections in life, times when we all arrive at a 4-way stop at the same time. It's those times when we have a choice to make. Either we pay attention to one another and use care as we proceed or we ignore our fellow travelers, focus only on our own wants or needs, and charge forward and cause a huge crash ... a huge crash that breaks someone's heart, wounds someone's spirit, smashes someone's soul.

When I come to the 4-way stops in life, God ... when I come to the places where the road I'm traveling intersects the roads of others, Lord ... help me to appreciate the differences. Help me to recognize that we are all at the same place ... help me to marvel at where we came from ... help me to see the beauty in what carried us there ... help me to wonder at where we are going. Help me to appreciate the differences, Father ... to stop, to wait, to proceed with lovingkindness, compassion, gentleness, understanding and love. When I come to the 4-way stops in life, Lord ... help me to see You on every corner.