Go Ahead and Hug Me ... I Dare You

Remember a few posts ago when I wrote about the company I work for giving us Jawbone UP fitness wristbands? And how excited I was about it? Well, since then, I've decided it may well be one of the coolest things I've ever owned. The first few days of wearing it, I was completely obsessed with checking all the information it tracks. People can invite me to be teammates with them, or I can invite other people to join me. I love seeing how I measure up to my workmates in the steps per day arena, mainly because me and the wiener dog walk just about every evening. So far, I'm doing pretty well keeping up with all the young folks, which is good for this old gal's self image for sure. But the most fascinating feature of the Jawbone to me is that it tracks my sleep patterns ... how long it takes me to fall asleep, how long I sleep, how many hours of light sleep vs. deep sleep I get, how many times I wake up and how long I'm awake during the night. Absolutely fascinating to me ... especially on nights like Sunday night when it told me I woke up four times and was awake for almost an hour. I only remember waking up one time ... because the thunder and lightning woke me up. And of course, if I am awakened by stormy weather, I'm jumping on my laptop to check the radar. Don't even say it ... at least I didn't drag the dogs and their kennels to the basement and sleep in my storm fort.

While I was checking the weather, a story popped up on my newsfeed that caught my attention ... a story about hugging, and more specifically, about how many hugs a person needs each day. I had only read the first few lines of the story, and I was hooked; in fact, I was so intrigued that I began to do what I often do when my interest is peaked on a certain subject ... I started researching the premises that were espoused in the original story to see if they were indeed accurate. And I must say that I was quite surprised to find scientific research that backed up the statistics I had read in the first article. It turns out humans have a neurotransmitter called oxytocin, also known as the "bonding" hormone. And get this ... hugs stimulate the production of oxytocin which contributes to our feeling of connectedness, and as a result, ramps up our feel-good quotient and happiness level. And even more amazing to me is the following information ... we need four hugs per day for survival, eight hugs per day to maintain our emotional and psychological stability, and 12 hugs per day for personal growth. Wow. Wow. Wow. Those stats were more than just interesting to me, they were sobering as well and I'll explain why in a bit.

I've always been a hugger ... if you don't believe me, just ask my children. I'm pretty sure if I didn't teach them any other lesson in life, I taught them the importance of a hug. I hug them hello ... I hug them goodbye ... I hug them when they tell me some fantastic news ... I hug them when they are hurting ... I hug them for no reason other than to hug them. I have hugged my children since the day they were born, and I will hug them until I draw my last breath. All of my children are good huggers, as are Brad's girlfriend, my daughter-in-law and my son-in-law ... in fact, the first night I met Shelby, I remember telling Brad, "This gal knows how to give a hug, buddy ... I like her!" All of them give strong, lasting, wrapped in their arms, hold on tightly hugs ... I never get an air hug or a lean in but not too close hug or a pat me on the shoulder hug from my kids. My sweet little mom would have said, "Them kids hug like they're gonna squeeze the starch out of a person! Lord, help! Them kids sure know how to hug the right way!" And you know what? My kids would give anything to be able to wrap their Granny in their arms one more time and "squeeze the starch out of her."

As I climbed back into bed next to my sleeping hounds Sunday night, one overwhelming thought consumed me ... I wonder if hugs from dogs count, because if they don't, I'm in trouble. The statistics about the number of hugs a person needs each day to be emotionally healthy and happy were sobering to me because there are many days now when I'm hugless since my children no longer live at home. I suppose that could explain, in part at least, why I feel so alone and sad at times. The hugging information I read has been rolling around in my mind for the last couple of days, obviously, since I'm writing about it tonight. So much so that when I was leaving the office this evening and saw one of my guy friends waiting for his girlfriend to pick him up, I put my things in my car and walked back over to him and gave him a long and lasting hug. And when I turned to head back to my car, the young man said, "Thank you, Terrie ... I needed that hug today." So did I, my friend ... so did I.

I think there was a reason why I was awakened by the thunder and lightning on Sunday ... I think there was a reason why I read the words I did about the importance and power of a hug. I think it was because I'm meant to understand and learn what it really means to have a servant heart and what it really means to care about the needs of others around me. I think it was meant to teach me that it's not necessarily so much about the hug itself as it is about the love behind it. So, go ahead and hug me ... I dare you. We will both be better people because of it ... I promise.